the worst

of course things can always get worse. we can also be in a car accident while worrying about cancer.

but i want to stick to what i know. and the worst possible scenario now is - a 4 to 10 months marathon of chymotherapy. after the shock when i heard about it, i've gotten used to it and became emotionally ready.

on sunday we go to see another specialist, to hear a second opinion. and from here on i think the news can only get better, and i think they will. maybe no chymo. maybe less chymo. maybe no cancer!, g-d willing.

a week ago i went to the pool with the boys and my heart was very heavy. i could only think about cancer. the tears choked me often. who knows when we'll be able to do this again? who knows if i'll come here in the future with nathan only, and how sad that will be for both of us...

and now i went swimming with the boys again and i was totally at ease. i forgot about cancer. there was no cancer in the air! whatever tomorrow may bring, today was just a good, regular day.


by aba david, 3/10/10